We Hate Hipsters

Right when you thought it was safe to stride city streets, this weekend brings Lollapalooza. Yes, Austin and Brooklyn are about to barf up their hipsters all over us...again. I survived Pitchfork. I survived because there is definitely an audience breach afoot. There exists an audience which loves the music for the music, an audience which is growing as exponentially as the hipsters are. I believe music and culture will survive the hipsters mad attempt to co-opt everybody's childhood for their own. I have hope.

But some of you may be wondering, "What is a hipster and why should I be scared?"

Adbusters provides the answer. The new issue has a well-written article titled, "Hipster: The Dead End of Western Civilization".

Hipsterdom is the first “counterculture” to be born under the advertising industry’s microscope, leaving it open to constant manipulation but also forcing its participants to continually shift their interests and affiliations. Less a subculture, the hipster is a consumer group – using their capital to purchase empty authenticity and rebellion. But the moment a trend, band, sound, style or feeling gains too much exposure, it is suddenly looked upon with disdain. Hipsters cannot afford to maintain any cultural loyalties or affiliations for fear they will lose relevance.

Excellent! Clap, clap! Growing up, going to Metro all ages shows, was not a happy time in my life. I wouldn't repeat a day of my adolescence for all the money in the world. When I went to the shows, I didn't think I was cool. I was looking for something to communicate why I didn't fit in. What I loved about the indie scene of the early to mid-90s is that there were all kinds of people invited. Everyone brought their own knowledge.

Hipsters breed out these differences. Everything about them is manufactured, because they've never learned appreciation. Their taste has not been developed and, stunted, it's rotting. They are true culture zombies. If you value art, you must make sure they are ignored and remain in their ghettos.