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Thursday, March 6, 2008

Feeling like yourself

Yesterday I ran into Jacqueline, a friend of a friend, at Whole Foods. I've been hiding out in Evanston because of my current employment situation. I can't spend money I'm not earning. Talking to Jacqueline yesterday, I was not uncomfortable at all. I told her about the possibilites of grad school. I did state that I was on my way home from work (even though it was not even four). Sure, I lied. But if a lie is preventing you from being awkward, if it's a legit self-defense mechanism, doesn't it absolve itself? If the lie doesn't hurt anyone, and saves you from pain?

Last night I got stoned, and I thought about the last job. I remembered some criticism, my boss had given me in the last couple of weeks. I also recalled another manager asking to go out with me over the last month or so. I never took him up on the offer. Did I not do good work? Is that why I got fired? I don't want to think so. Just the weekend before I was dismissed, I went to the Hilton at 7:45 A.M. to check in. Sure, I didn't actually enter, but I did call my contact and see if he needed anything.

Why can I not disconnect from this situation? Why can't my failures find their way home? Why do they suffer me so?

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Hillary continues

Hillary won both Texas and Ohio yesterday, which means she and Obama will duke it out until probably June. People think it will hurt either in the general election, but I don't know. As long as they don't damage each other irreparably (which with a Clinton involved you can't take for granted), the two of them should dominate the media coverage for the next while. McCain will be like that great show on the CW-you're aware of it, but you don't even know what channel number it is. Whatever happens, it promises to be interesting.

Brett Favre retired yesterday. I think the Bears have an outside chance to win the division next year-and no, not because they just signed Marty Booker. When Marty Booker was last good for the Bears, I was still sulking through my undergrad years. The hope for the Bears lies in the defense, as their offense looks horrible right now.

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Living in sin

Kara and I are finally officially under one roof together. Yesterday I gathered the rest of my stuff from Dan's crazy house. I'm pretty damn excited. There are very few moments where you knowingly step into the future. No longer will I have to battle another human who I don't have any feelings for in my living space. And it's bigger than that. The retreat Kara and I went on last weekend made it pretty clear to me that I'm making the right call with all this.

I dropped off my application for grad school at DePaul yesterday. Who knows what will happen. I know I will get in, but it really all comes down to what kind of financial aid I can get. I won't be horribly disappointed if it doesn't work out.

Today is like the fifth Super Tuesday. It doesn't look like the results will change much-unless Obama wins both states. It could happen. I wonder what Hill will do after all this. Will she be content to live out the rest of her days as the junior senator from NY?